PHOTO PROMPT © Shaktiki Sharma
Alison fled into the evening. Her tears splintering the glare of the neon signs, she lifted her arm to a taxi she hadn’t the money for.
It sprayed the shimmering lights of a puddle at her as it passed. She watched the shattered reflections reform.
The bus-stop timetable affirmed her last chance home had departed.
“My husband is enough,” she told herself.
Through the window, John was at the jukebox buying more shared memories.
As she approached him, Ben E King pleaded, “Darling, Stand by Me.”
“You came back,” John said plainly.
“Could you…?” she faltered, “…I can’t get home.”
Written for Friday Fictioneers – a 100 words story based on a photo prompt. Hosted by Rochelle. Read the other entries here.
she’s asking him to spot her the cash for a taxi???? I like this woman
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I think she’s in a situation she’d rather not be in, but fate is pushing her.
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Her options seems a bit slim… but maybe John’s happy to play the second fiddle.
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I think John feels he only has to wait because love conquers all, she wants to do the right thing by society’s code but fate keeps sending her back to John.
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It sprayed the shimmering lights of a puddle at her as it passed. She watched the shattered reflections reform.
Man! I wish I’d come up with this line. That said, I want to go back and read last week’s submission and get back to you.
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Thank you very much, I love it when someone likes a line, it says, you’re doing a good job.
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My thoughts exactly, Alicia!
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Ouch! Was join excited that she “came back” only to smashed down again by the lack of taxi money? And Alison? Will she ever find her husband enough if she ultimately needs to convince herself? Perfect sequel.
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I think you’ve hit the nub here. She so wants to do the right thing and for her husband to be enough but, ultimately circumstances force her back to John, will she be able to resist?
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Wow! I just reread my comment and can’t even blame spell check for all the errors! Sorry. I’m glad you figured out what I was trying to say.
Are you going to try to continue the story using FF prompts? That would be fun.
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Funny you should say that, I had thought about continuing it in 100 word sections, so that hopefully you get a stand alone story each time, a different song in the background with a thread leading to a complete story and I’ll find out what she decides or how fate treats her. I don’t think I’ll inflict it on FF though, it might bore people and they’d have to keep referring back. I’ll just make a section for it on my blog.
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Others have continued a story that way on FF and it was gobs of fun. Just sayin’.
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Sad tale with a truthful twist. Reality bites John on the backside. I wonder if he’ll give her the money or tell her to get lost? Lovely descriptions, Michael
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It’s whether, despite trying to resist him she’ll manage if constantly having contact with him.
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True. He must have left a hole in her life if nothing else – perhaps she won’t know what she had till it’s gone.
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I’m going to try to find out what happens next. I’ll let you know. 🙂
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Look forward to it 🙂
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It’s on its way 🙂
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🙂
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She’s certainly got some front! Somehow, I don’t think her husband is enough or she wouldn’t be messing around with John, but if he’s got any sense, he will tell her to ring her husband to pick her up! The descriptions of the lights and reflections are beautiful and you have captured the human characteristics perfectly.
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I think she’s trying to stay away from him and do the right thing but fate and events keep taking her back to him, will she be able to resist?
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Sounds like fate has spoken.
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It may have but she’s fighting it, so far
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Gosh… I think she is very strong to go back for help. I think my pride would force me to walk. A hard tale
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In one way she has no option but to go back, in another she’s letting circumstances dictate her next move. She wants both outcomes deep down, but can only have one and it’s playing on her mind.
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Thats so interesting.
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Good girl. Let him pay for your departure too. That feels final.
Tracey
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Not sure she’ll be able to just walk away, but we’ll see. It would have been best for her, if she wants to be true to her husband, to not see John again, I think.
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you certainly have a way with words. i bow. i bow.
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Thank you that’s very nice of you to say so. Extremely pleasing to wake up to
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I’m with Alicia…that is a great line. I wonder what John will do. I feel sorry for him and a measure of disdain for Alison.
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At the ,moment I feel sorry for both, it’s society’s barriers keeping them apart and she in particular is loathe to disregard them.
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Hmm. I read this backward. Somehow I thought John was the husband and she had dumped him at a restaurant and was only going back for cab fare. Now I sort of have some disdain for John too depending on what he decides. I am without a lot of back story but I think I stand with society on this one.
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Thanks for your comment. It’ll be good if people take sides as it unfolds and maybe change sides as it twists, could be fun.
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All the best stories are written to make us constantly question whose side we should be on.
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Alison is not being fair to either of them and risks losing it all…
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In her attempts to be fair to all three of them, I think she’s being unfair to all. She’s under pressure.
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Hmmmm. Curiouser and curiouser goes this drama’s unfolding. I hope she really DOES the right thing this time.
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Thanks for reading. I’m enjoying this saga as it’s a tale of conscience and I’m not sure ht the right thing is.
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I think that if she dumps John and goes back to her husband, it’s only a matter of time before she finds yet another man, unless a marriage counsellor can miraculously fix what’s wrong with the relationship. …Oh, cynic me. I agree with the others about those “shattered reflections reformed”.
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I think you have valid points. I’m carrying it on to see how it turns out, trying not to be too judgemental, but you’re right, if love arrives from outside the marriage and the marriage if only sufficient, she probably has little chance of resisting temptation.
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I like the idea of a sequel or even an entire novella through the 100 word photo prompts. It kind of gives an anchor to the thought process. Wonderful. Alison is being tested on her commitment to her husband. John reflects what’s missing in her life and marriage. She is being forced to choose. Let’s hope she has made the right one for her.
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Thanks for a wonderful comment and encouragement. I have decided to continue in the format to see how it pans out. It’ll be on my blog under “The Whole of the Moon”
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Beautiful words here, Michael–– “It sprayed the shimmering lights of a puddle at her as it passed. She watched the shattered reflections reform.” Chills. That said, man, this lady’s got gaul… despite her vulnerability.
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Thanks Dawn, Happy New Year. I feel for her because her conscience says one thing, her heart is forcing her where she doesn’t feel she should go
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Dear Michael,
She’s in a tough situation. The question is, can she truly walk away from John and still ask for his help? Realistic and emotional. Well done.
Happy New Year,
Rochelle
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Thanks, Rochelle. Her conscience wants her to keep away, but she’s battling her heart. How it turns out I don’t know, so I’ve decided to keep writing it for a while to see.
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Well written, Michael. I could feel her despair. It’s a terrible thing to have to ask someone
for money when you need to walk away. This leaves many questions. A good one for a longer write.
Happy New Year 2017 🎉 Cheers 🍷
Isadora 😎
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Thanks Isadora, I’ve decided to keep writing this tale in 100 word chapters under the title, “The Whole of the Moon,” to see where it ends up.
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I’m looking forward to reading it. Great idea. 😎
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This is a BAAAAD relationship!
And I know BAAAAD relationships! lol
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Hi Dawn, thanks for your comment. It is bad in the first appraisal but, I’m interested in how it’ll pan out. If love conquers all, can the protagonists be blamed for falling under its spell? To that purpose I’m continuing the tale in 100 word chapters to see where it takes us.
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