Mother Warned Me About You, Harold Halfsharp!








Eileen Halfsharp stood arms crossed, biceps like hams, her bottom lip assaulting her nose.
“What’s that look for?” stammered Halfsharp.
“It seemed appropriate for the occasion. Why is one of my chairs in the river?”
“Thought I’d catch us dinner, you like a nice trout. When the fish are used to the chair, I’ll get on it and pull ‘em out”
Eileen’s brow creased menacingly, “In all these forty years, you’ve never got it quite right,” she rumbled.
“It’s the thought that counts?” Halfsharp offered nervously.
“And if I catch the bugger that coined that phrase, I’ll swing for him!”

Written for Friday Fictioneers – a 100 words story based on a photo prompt. Hosted by Rochelle. Read the other entries here.


59 thoughts on “Mother Warned Me About You, Harold Halfsharp!

  1. To coin another phrase she obviously wears the trousers in that relationship! The description of Eileen paints a vivid picture. I do feel a bit of sympathy for him though. As a Fulham supporter, I am used to supporting the under-dog!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The old joke of the woman saying to the doctor she had a terrible problem of her husband filling the tub full of water, getting in with his fishing pole and fishing into the commode. The doc asked if she had ever seen a psychiatrist, she said, “No, I’m too busy cleaning fish.” Maybe the guy has something there.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. I think there will be a long line of people myself included waiting to swing for the bugger that coined that phrase. I love the idea of Halfsharp leaving the chair in the river and waiting for the fish to get used to it. I can imagine him thinking he’s just had the smartest idea ever when he came up with that one

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A man would be hard-pushed to view a woman like Eileen through rose-coloured spectacles. She’s fearsome and I bet she nags her husband like a fishwife (no apologies for the pun). You’ve painted such a brilliant picture of her. I bet that Halfsharp wishes Eileen did catch the bugger who coined that phrase!

    Liked by 1 person

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